Those 'You Know You’re From Brighton' lists...

It’s been absolute yonks since I did an easy-peasy (lazy) ‘lists’ blog, which is lax of me as apparently such posts should be a staple part of any blogger’s portfolio…

So, to this end, here’s a rehash of those ‘Brightonian’ lists that have been doing the rounds for years now, in one format or another.

You know you're from Brighton when:

You ignore the Seagulls, as they’re as much a Brightonian as you are

You DON’T eat the local fish and chips, as they are overrated

Every other person you know is vegan or vegetarian

You went to Alleycats in the 90’s, and drank cocktails whilst they were projecting The Empire Strikes Back onto a big sheet

You always walk up Queen’s Road on one side, and down it on the other

You’ve eaten a baguette in the Pavilion Gardens

You greet all your friends with a kiss, regardless of gender or preference

You know Disco Pete is a typical Brighton resident

You still refer to renamed nightclubs and bars by their proper names (Paradox, Pink Coconut, Event {not Event II}, Berlin Bar, Helsinkis, Hungry Years, The Gloucester etc etc etc)

You never came out of the Gloucester sober, back in the day

You don’t recognise the term Brighton Lanes (there’s an ‘i’ in it you know!)

You can find your way around the LAINES without GPS

You remember when the West Pier had skin, and not just bones

You can’t ever bring yourself to call the living pier anything other than PALACE Pier

You used to sing karaoke at Horatio’s / Offshore Bar on the above

You went on the Helter Skelter, when it was the ONLY ride on the above – but still couldn’t see the Isle of Wight

You remember Hot Shots & Jumping Jacks in North Street, though not necessarily fondly

You played with coloured balls at the above

You’ve made a pilgrimage to the Chattri, which took longer than you expected it would

Your first taste of Absinthe or Tuaca was in a local bar

You met someone for a first date at the old Wishing Well

You’ve seen Chris Eubank blocking a street with his motor

You know all about Pirates Deep

You had your photo taken next to the Athina B

You’ve opted for Cheeky Chicken, instead of KFC after clubbing

You’ve had a row in a taxi queue at 3am

You’ve bought a special remedy from a special shop that with no special medical basis was supposed to miraculously cure your special ailment

In the 90’s you had Christmas drinks at The Quadrant in the summer, because the landlord didn’t like Christmas

In the 80’s you just HAD to have the best steak in town at Jacco’s

You know Hove is really another place altogether actually, despite the constitutional title

You remember only ever having coffee in Wimpy in the past, because Starbuck(s) was just a character in Battlestar Galactica

You hurdled the barrier at Brighton Station toilets to have a free wee

You can always find a space to park

You used to go to The Zap on Monday night

You remember The Smugglers bar experimenting with doubling up as a Chinese Restaurant

You got splashed by Dolphins – indoors

In the past you could drive anywhere in town, as bus lanes didn’t exist

You remember frequently eating at Cactus Canteen

In the 80’s you were dragged along by your parent to Holiday on Ice at the Brighton Centre

In the 80’s you dragged your parents along to The Monster Lego Show at the Brighton Centre

You know you’re home when you see the Brighton Pylons on the A23

You had your first snog between 0150 and 0210 at the The Event / Event II / Oceana / Prizm / Top Rank Suite – probably to True by Spandau Ballet

You’re proud of Pride

You’ve never seen the inside of Komedia in the day time

You’ve had a birthday party at McDonalds, which included a tour of their kitchens

You’ve always avoided Yates Wine Lodge like the plague

Funny how lots of these are booze related… not sure what that says about us Brightonians!

Poems from the Past

Well dear readers, I’ve somehow reached 60 blogs (S I X T Y!!!) – How did that happen!?

So to celebrate (and for a massive change of tack) I thought I’d publish something a little bit different for a change. 

In Fair Verona?

In the mid to late 1990’s, I amassed about 300 ‘writings / poems / lyrics’ that probably captured a time for me. Frankly I have no idea if they’re any good or not (and I’m content that it doesn’t really matter either way), but I stumbled across a couple when clearing out some (very) old eMails this week, and thought I’d reproduce them here for your reading pleasure (I hope!):

1)
Would you ever leave me here?
Walk away from me and cry no tears?
No regrets because you got your own way

…are you happy today?

I guess I should have realised
the moment I looked in your eyes
that you could never share my heart

…and now we're apart

You made me beg for all that I could never have.
You always knew that it would only end so bad - why did I try?

I can hear you telling me
'I don't love you, so leave me be'
You don't know how it is to feel this way

…dying all day


2)
Hated art thou, who break the heart
and live off the pain instilled when we part
Crying doth seal the doom felled within
and time never heals where love has once been

A wish felt true should not be cast gone
Still vows art broken, beseeched and undone
Daggers thine spoke. impaling mine soul
Sins best forgotten – red eyes take the toll

A bounty kept – return you may
Forgiveness desired, for morrow's the day

For once true love – thine eyes knew no truth –
Passion bore crime, dying was mine proof
Caring child fool, whom loving doth kill
and never felt touch nor heaven fulfil

So forth is now, thou cannot deceive
and cometh the hour to no longer grieve
Haste replaced when fortunes arise
So ends mine life till gone art thou lies