On another forum I
subscribe to, there was recently a debate about whether to attend school
reunions. It was a mixed bag of comments, but a definite stronger leaning
towards negativity:
The negative comments:
“The same
clicky groups still existed”
“Shouldn’t
have gone – far too much water had passed under the bridge”
“I don't feel
the need to catch up with a bunch of people I didn't really like in school”
“If I wanted
to keep in contact with my friends I would have done”
“Full of people looking to boast how well they're doing
and bore you with baby photos – too many hideous look at ‘me-ers’… a bit like
most people's Facebook page!“
The positive comments:
“It was
absolutely brilliant, people chatting like there had never been a gap”
“I felt good to see my old school friends again”
“We recounted hilarious memories and stories – I’m so glad I
went”
“It was great meeting two of my oldest mates, but it didn't
give me any burning desire to rekindle old friendships.”
In my experience and research, the last comment possibly sums up quite a
few people’s views. ‘Yes it was good to
see an old mate, but we won’t be sending Christmas cards this year and it’s
likely I’ll not see them again for equally as long a time…’
One other person made the observation that the key to a successful reunion
(be it school, work or otherwise) is for the participants to have actually been
friends once upon a time. A reunion with those that you vaguely knew or didn’t
like could quite easily be rather dull and / or awkward.
As a result of old class
mates joining the Friends Reunited
website around the turn of the millennium, a ten year school reunion was
organised in 2002. Personally I was well up for it, so I wilfully attended.
My impression at the end of
the night was that it was a roaring success as around a hundred classmates from
the ‘Class of 1992’ were able to attend and I honestly didn’t see an ego in
sight. Everyone was incredibly friendly to each other and any daft gripes had
been rightfully left in the past.
And whilst I wouldn’t say
that my school years were the very best of my life, that night proved to me
that, on the whole, those years were pretty good actually.
The only disappointing
aspect for me was that some of my very closest friends wouldn’t / couldn’t
attend, and I really think they missed out on a great night. Maybe they would
disagree!
I recall one such friend
(with whom I’d maintained contact since school) stating that he wouldn’t go
because – to his mind – hardly anybody liked him. The truth was that many asked
after him on the night and he was incredibly well loved. Perception is a very
strong emotion.
A few years later a couple
of mini reunions were organised, but had very few attendees, and the 20 year
anniversary came and went without anyone noticing.
My guess about the lack of
enthusiasm since that terrific night in 2002, is that the social networking era
we now live in has probably negated the need for such events.
Nowadays you have even
greater control and choice, and near enough anyone you want to get in contact
with can quite easily be found on Facebook – and
likewise you can ignore a lot of people too!
People knock Facebook a
lot, but it has its place. For some, it’s clearly a hub for inane gossip,
drivel and bitching – but for many others it’s a genuinely powerful support
mechanism. Just ask people who have gone through relationship break ups, or
suffered bereavements.
I’ve connected with people
on Facebook that I barely knew at school, and the kindness they showed me when
I needed it was overwhelming at times, so I personally am extremely grateful
for social networking, as it helped me no end.
I digress!
So is there a place for reunions
still? Well possibly, but you might find the numbers diminishing in this age of
when everyone knows everything about everyone.
A Reunion Party Vs Lack of Privacy.
What’s more scary for you
baby?