40 Somethings

Well I’ve nearly made it through the first year of my forties, a time when life supposedly begins.

I’ve read a lot lately on various forums that I subscribe to about this decade of your life being absolutely dreadful, with ‘supporting evidence’ along the lines of: 

 

You can’t run uphill anymore

 

Your body stops working

 

More people you know start to die than get married or have children

 

Your children shout at you because they will be older than babies and probably) younger than 20

 

If you don't have children you may have resent or regret

You’ve had a mid-life crisis, or are expecting one soon

 

Injuries take an age to heal – if ever…

You have to watch your weight and take more medication

You go grey, or bald – or both

Everyone shouts at you

 

You piss people off all the time

 

You miss Downton Abbey

You've either taken on too much at work in a bid to keep up, or you're

stuck in a dead end employment

You worry about your health, your aging parents’ health and your children’s health, all in the same conversation

You might have enough money to treat all this stress with red wine or beer but, if you do, you will put on 5 stone just opening the bottle

You’re a narcissist and neurotic at the same time

 

So some of the above is funny, some is rubbish, and maybe just some of it is concerning.

I also did a Google search for ’40 Somethings’ which for some reason by and large elicited Jennifer Aniston.



Rachel - She'll always be there for you



It’s all very personalised though isn’t it?

 

I recall having a wobble of sorts just after I turned 30, believing nobody loved me and that I’d lost my salad days forever etc. (total rubbish of course) – yet 10 years later, having passed 40, I had no thoughts of a similar ilk, and found that I simply encountered a different set of life issues instead. Such as anti-depressants, and taking dare into my stride by hoying myself out of plane for charrriiiidddeeeee, which was incredibly amazing, but it does sound equally incredibly insane.

The medication wasn’t (isn’t) for depression so to speak, but for anxiety, which I still don’t understand fully, but I think it helps take the edge off for me in these times. It means I shout less, and panic less, and this is definitely progress. The doctor described it as "life in the 21st Century"

 

Tiredness is the killer for me – which will make Mrs Berrylogs laugh and frown in equal measure as she feels I get more lie ins than her (I do).

The juggle of working, being a dad to three at key stages in their own lives (17, 13, 4), maintaining a hopefully healthy marriage and striving to keep a social life going does take it out of you … and after that there’s still the vacuuming and ironing to do!

 

Football used to be my anti-depressant medication, but the older I’ve got, the more I’ve come to accept that the beautiful game is largely just about luck, and therefore I’m now content not to hit the stress / destress levels with quite the same anger as might have been the case in the past. Football is still good escapism, but I don’t find myself having my nights ruined just because the Albion lost anymore. This is also a good thing! It doesn’t mean I enjoy football any less, it just means I’m less likely to have a heart attack on a stadium concourse over it. Touch wood.

 

What does annoy me on a daily basis though, is eating. I love the food I love (who doesn’t?) but find it doesn’t love me back as much. What a bitch eh!?

Not sure how I help things regarding this as my limited food range hinders major changes to my diet. And I could never ever give up salt & vinegar crisps (I'd sooner give up chocolate.)

 

My drinking habits haven’t changed much in 20 odd years now, but one day that may catch up with me. Never had a hangover yet though and hopefully never will, so long may that continue. Still laughing at the outright anger I encountered a few weeks ago when someone refused to accept this as fact. I could only put their response down to jealousy.

Either that or they thought I was lying?

 

Am I grumpier, now I’m older? Yes probably, but don’t begrudge 40 Somethings that – they often delight in being a grump!

 

Socially it’s actually pretty tasty as things stand. Regular gatherings of various kinds keep that fun ticking along.

Do I miss the old days of pubbing and clubbing? (See previous blog November 1993 !)

I don’t so much desire to do it now, but I enjoy reliving and reviving the past on occasion. At a friend’s recent 40^th birthday party, where some lifelong friends rolled back 20 years and had a great night, one said to me that they"missed nights like these", but I believe everyone and everything has their time... that said, there’s no reason to stop enjoying it just because we’re twice as old. In all honesty I don’t feel much differently to how I felt 20 years ago anyway, though my body might sometimes disagree.

 

The truth of it all is that I feel very lucky, and very happy where I am at the moment. Things could always be worse, and this is sadly very true for some people I know. Compared to some, I have nothing worth complaining about.

 

Going back to an earlier point in this post, it is true that a sadly regular flow of people I grew up with have passed away, whereas before the age of 38, I think I went well over 10 years in not experiencing any kind of loss. At the rate of one a year since then, it only adds resolve to want to enjoy life while you can, and ride over the aggravation that pops up on occasion.

 

Relax if you can and chill in your 40s – you might find you enjoy them after all!

The Top 30 Best Selling UK Singles Part 1

Okay so after a brief hiatus from blogging, I’ll start up again with a bit of music! 

I don’t tend to buy many music magazines these days, having spent years thumbing through NME and MOJO back in the day. However I do tend to have more of a glimpse when they have their latest greatest songs of all time poll results. National newspapers have a crack at it too occasionally, and whilst there are some songs that regularly make the higher echelons of the lists, the variety and current trends always amaze me. Maybe that’s good though, as music should be ever evolving – after all, The Beatles wouldn’t have achieved immortality had they recorded ‘Love Me Do’ songs for ten years. 

I’m never satisfied with the lists when they come out though. For years I’ve craved a poll that truly reflects the greatest songs ever, and the only way I reckon that could be achieved would be to add it as a mandatory question in the National Census: 
Question 15: What is your favourite song?

Only then will it be definitive! 

It’s hard therefore to do a personal review of the greatest songs of all time as it provokes too much doubt and debate as to whether certain songs should be on the list in the first place. 

What IS definitive is a best SELLING singles list. 

To this end where else to go but Wikipedia to view the Top40 Best Selling UK Singles , and have a little play with that list. 
I’ve included double A-sides where they warrant a mention – note to kids: ask a grown up what a double A-side is… 

Strictly speaking blogs shouldn’t be more than 800 words to keep people vaguely interested, so I’ll do this one as a two parter to stop you getting bored, and restrict it to the top 30!

Curiously though, not one of these songs makes my own favourite top ten…

Part 1: 30 – 21

30.  Eye of the Tiger – Survivor

To me this is all about Rocky 3 (my favourite of the franchise I should add) – undoubtedly aided by being associated to the film, I wonder if it would be on this list, had Sly Stallone hung up his gloves after Rocky 2?

29.  Can't Buy Me Love – The Beatles

Unsurprisingly there are a few Beatles entries in this list. I love the Beatles to the n^th degree, but controversially I have to confess CBML is not amongst my favourites. Can't put my finger on why as I can rarely find fault in any of their catalogue.

28.  Three Lions (and 3 Lions ‘98) – Baddiel & Skinner & The Lightning Seeds

Hmm.. not sure the idea of the game is to combine two chart runs of a song that actually each has more than 50% different lyrics. Brilliant record which brings back memories galore of the summer of 1996 – but lucky to make the top 40 on this combined issue.

27.  Perfect Day – Various Artists for Children in Need

I bought the CD single of this primarily to hear the gender specific versions included therein – probably available on YouTube to have a listen to. The original composer Lou Reed (RIP) himself sings on this, so thankfully it wasn’t butchered. Seemed to linger in the charts for ages, and the accompanying video was pretty good too.

26.  I Will Always Love You – Whitney Houston

Talking of lingering in the chart for ages. Poor Whitney (again RIP) gets a bad rap for this on the basis of it being overplayed, and by default of being a Christmas number 1 it has since become a Christmas playlist staple. I liked it in 1992, but a little less as each year goes by.

25.  Don't You Want Me – The Human League

I wonder if lead singer Phil Oakey knew how much this song would eventually be covered by millions due to his long lost cousin Carrie? A definitive 80’s classic though. Even the cover by The Farm wasn’t bad either – plus the video of the latter version featured one Rik Mayall (another RIP)

24.  Blurred Lines – Robin Thicke featuring T.I. and Pharrell Williams

Ah 2013 – the year Pharrell Williams became omnipresent. I shouldn’t really indulge, but the X-rated version of this catchy song is worth a view on YouTube (if you’re an adult) #cough

Even just a year later, where is Robin Thicke now?

23.  Two Tribes – Frankie Goes to Hollywood

Again another song accompanied by an interesting video. Worthy follow up to the other FGTH song that appears higher up this list…

22.  I'll Be Missing You – Puff Daddy featuring Faith Evans

I wonder how well this song would have fared had Diana POW not died. Songs often bring far more comfort in times of pain than we might realise, and this certainly benefitted from a nation in mourning. To be fair the song is a good sampler, as samplers go – and who could fail with that STINGing bassline?

21.  Summer Nights – John Travolta & Olivia Newton-John

I never really got into Grease as a child. I think because my dad didn’t like it much, and therefore nor did we as children. And then you grow up and change your mind! The less said about Grease 2 the better though.

Part 2

Those 'Child of the 90's' lists...!!!

Well following on from my 'Child of the 80's' blog, along came a request from my lovely cousin to do a 90's review...How could I decline!?

These are not so prevalent as the 80’s ones, so with a little spousal help, a few have been added!

You know you're a child of the 90's when:

'Race issue' meant arguing about who ran the fastest

Definitely wasn’t me!

Interactive games meant going to the park to play with friends

RIP playing at the park

"Talk to the hand" was enough said

“As you do…”

You remember when Billie Piper was a pop star

Yeah I’m sure there’s a misnomer there somewhere

An android was a robot and tablets were medication

Why do we still call it ‘dialling a number’?

You remember Ant and Dec when they were PJ and Duncan, and thought Donna Air was ‘all that’

Nah I’m not sure she was ever ‘all that’

It wasn't odd to have two or three best friends

I reckon the group of 6 or 7 I was in were all good friends – only took one argument to break it up though!

Playing Super Nintendo was the hardest thing ever

PS1/2/3/4 – same argument for me!

TFI Friday was as wild as your weekend got

Danny Baker doesn’t fail at anything.

You remember when Blue Peter presenters were squeaky clean

They’re all at it you know…

You screamed at the dopey contestants in The Crystal Maze

Jeebus some of the klutzes on that programme. Richard O’Brien’s calm exterior deserved an Oscar

You wanted your dying moments to be constructed by Shakespears Sister

She used to look a lot less scary

If you had a million dollars, you could do pretty much what you liked with Demi Moore

Even get a Dudley Moore haircut ©F.R.I.E.N.D.S

You believed NO NO, NO-NO NO NO, NO-NO NO NO, NO NO THERE’S NO LIMIT

5 weeks at #1, following Whitney’s ‘I Will Always Love You’ – which had been #1 for 10 weeks. Some of us had a limit – and it was definitely breached.

You could do ‘The Macarena’ and ‘Saturday Night’ move by move – and repeat

No but I could Moonwalk on the right surface with the right shoes

You debated with your friends how Rose could have saved Jack

The most memorable scene in Titanic for me was seeing Mr.Soft walking the decks during one of the CGI long distance shots:

You could recite the intro to ‘Never Ever’ by heart

I tried and tried but just couldn’t bring myself to like these girls. They just weren’t the Spice Girls

Speaking of which, you could ‘zig-a-zig-ah’

I think I loved all of them at various stages… but always Emma the most

I queued up for 3 hours to get that. In Virgin Megastore Brighton (RIP)

You rejoiced that Julia Roberts made prostitution a fun thing

Not with those armpits

You can sing the rap to ‘The Fresh Prince Of Bel Air’

Absolutely, and it’s even more poignant now

You went to the cinema every week and Kevin Costner was in everything

Or Hugh Grant for that matter...

You remember when it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons

What is it with cookery programmes on Saturday mornings these days!!!???

You took plastic cartoon lunch boxes to school. With Capri Suns.

I necked 5 of these in a row a few of years ago. Top Tip: Don’t do it.

Most men dismissed Take That as rubbish

Oh how times have changed

You wore lime green all summer in 1996

Who didn’t?

You played and/or collected ‘Pogs’

No but I knew a man who did.

You rented Videos for £2.50, and DVD sounded like an illness.

Before even DVDs we had CD-i.

No really - click and view: CD-i

  

We called local radio stations to request songs. And would listen to them through our Walkmans

One of the best inventions ever.

If you couldn’t get an answer from Sabrina, Clarissa would Explain it All

You see Miley? Not all child stars went on the same rites of passage as you

School trips were better than family holidays

Because there was snogging probably!

Natalie Imbruglia from Neighbours could actually sing

Which was good because before that I was Torn

Speaking of which you used to run home at lunch break to get ahead of the game with Neighbours

Two words: Rachel Friend – sounds like she could have been in another show…

Those 'Child of the 80's' lists...

These babies must've been doing the rounds for years now.  Always worth a chuckle but I thought I'd give it a bit more context...

You know you're a child of the 80's when:

You remember when there was no breakfast TV and when TV shut down at midnight.

And Dad would open the window and turn the volume up so the neighbours could enjoy the National Anthem

There was nothing on TV in the middle of the day except for that test card girl with the clown and a blackboard.

Bless her heart she looked like a girl in my school moonlighting.

You can name at least half of the members of the elite Brat Pack.

They've never left the thoughts of this Man in Motion.

You remember when ATARI was a state of the art video game system.

I more recall the Commodore Vic 20 vs Commodore 64 vs ZX Spectrum 48k+ debate (the Speccy won)

You own any cassettes.

Of course...still have over 400. It's a collection dammit!

You remember dancing to Tiffany.

Yeah that was last week. I remember running just as fast as I can. Usually on the spot.

You were led to believe that in the year 2000 we'd all be living on the moon.

That is in fact what a bearded teacher told me in 1985. That all sadly changed in 1986.

You know who Max Headroom is. But did you ever find out if he was r-r-r-r-r-real?

Didn't get the joke in his name until years and years later when I had learnt how to drive.

You wore fluorescent, neon clothing.

Nope but my brother did.

You could breakdance, or wished you could.

Nope but my brother thought he could.

You Believed that 'By the power of Greyskull', you HAD the power.

I thought I would have power if I said it backwards. Evidently not. 

You remember David Hasselhoff when he wore clothes and talked to his car.

Here's some controversy...never liked Knight Rider. Never as good as the Dukes of Hazzard.

You carried your lunch to school in a Gremlins or an ET lunchbox.

No no.. forget that. Who else genuinely remembers ET biscuits?

You know the profound meaning of Wax on, Wax off.

I know that every kid called Daniel suddenly had an extra name.

You remember that spiky flat-tops were the rave after Top Gun.

Never.Seen.It.Like.Ever.

You used to get into the family car by sliding through the open window Dukes of Hazzard style.

No but my son has tried it recently

You saw Ghostbusters 7 times.

No but I saw Ghost at least 3 times.

You ran around the playground saying: "We came, we saw, we kicked ass!"

More like I hid in the corner praying for dear life during British Bulldog

Saturday was Multi Coloured Swap Shop day.

That bloke still has a tidy beard.

You wore leg-warmers (or knew someone who did)

Hated them as the girls always lent them to more popular boys than me.

You know the theme tune and the names of all the actors and characters in Dynasty.

Mmm Emma Samms / Fallon...

You remember watching a house inhabited by a jester, a pantomime horse, and a woman who sneezed, and thinking that this was perfectly normal.

No that was just rubbish.

Ooh, you could crush a Grape!

My mum took us to see that 'live'...and future friends of mine got to go on stage with Stu Francis and one of the Nolans.

The first time you ever kissed someone was at a dance during "Crazy for You" by Madonna.

My first kiss as an under 18, there was no music present. As an adult though it was actually to "La Bamba" by Los Lobos. Dead romantic.

You remember Now compilations that had the pig on the front cover (and ones in single figures...)

Yeah what WAS the idea behind the pig?

You owned, or wanted a "Frankie says..." T-shirt.

No but my Dad did.

You have ever danced (or even worse cried) to Kylie & Jason.

It WAS a beautiful wedding. 

Parachuting Action man was your favourite toy.

You mean those 3 inch plastic soldiers attached to a bit of string and a carrier bag that you lobbed into the air surely?

You thought ABBA were cool, the first time round!

Damn right they were.

You wore mismatched finger-less gloves.

Hell yeah

You remember when Betamax was at the cutting edge of technology.

Blank Betamax=195 minutes

Blank VHS=180 minutes

We had both!

Vimto / Dandelion & Burdock featured in your diet.

Every Christmas with every other Corona staple.

Fingermouse

How on Earth has that slipped under the radar?

You fantasised about those girls from that Robert Palmer video.

Nope just Cheryl Baker.

Your best mate had a Sodastream at home and you were jealous.

Everyone had one apart from us.

The expression "you sound like a broken record" means nothing to your children.

Basically this blog...!